I decided to drop one of my classes. Even though I haven’t dropped it yet, and won’t be dropping it for a few weeks, I feel so liberated! It’s a workshop class and though I have always depended on workshop to keep me writing, I’m finding myself utterly uninspired by workshop this semester.
Is it because it’s my last semester and I am just workshopped out? Is it because I want to focus on myself in a sort of silo for a little while at least and not deal with providing feedback for manuscripts other than my own (or those of my friends)? Is it because I’m just not into receiving feedback from a dozen people at a time for the time being? Is it because the instructor, as kind as she is, is just…TOO KIND for me to be inspired? Or is it all of the above? It’s all of the above. Yes, it is.
I feel a bit of a rebel feeling anti-workshop, especially since the workshop is the ultimate foundation of most MFA writing programs (I say most because I’m not sure if there are MFA programs out there who don’t offer workshops as a core requirement). And I feel rebellious because the workshop format has really been my writing friend for quite some time. Here I am, turning my back to the workshop! And turning completely
But I can’t drop for awhile. I get workshopped next week (I decided to drop the class right after I turned my manuscript in last wek for everyone to read and workshop this week). To drop the class RIGHT AFTER you get workshopped (and very early on in the semester, no less) is a totally dick move. As in, despite your best intentions, what everyone’s going to think is “Asshole!” There’s a lot of trust in a workshop–we read each other’s work in the spirit of how we want our own work to be read and analyzed. We trust we’ll all get our turn. So I’ll hold on for a bit, in respect of the workshop.