…and Circumstance

I am not a ceremony type of person. I didn’t walk in my undergrad graduation…and if I had it my way, I would never have had my wedding (my husband and I eloped…to the horrified reaction of our parents…so we appeased them with a grandiose wedding. So we got married TWICE).

Graduation now looms for me again. And I decided a few months ago that I wouldn’t walk in graduation. The thought of sitting in the hot summer sun in a black robe listening to speech after speech is just not appealing. I’ll have graduated, regardless–six months earlier, in December.

So no pomp for me. A grin on my face maybe, a deep cleansing breath, maybe a photograph of my thesis once it’s all printed out.

Call me anti-climactic.



Filed under MFA

14 responses to “…and Circumstance

  1. I didn’t have a wedding–we went to City Hall. I could never imagine myself having a wedding ceremony in front of people, it was never something I wanted. I did walk in my big graduation though — I thought it would be this great event I would always remember. I remember wearing this thick blue gown out in the sun, waiting for a very long time, and then they called “Masters of Fine Arts” and I stood up and then sat down. That was about it. My family was so far away I couldn’t see them. Later in the day was a smaller graduation for the School of the Arts, and that was nicer, but still artificial. I guess that’s not an advertisement to take part in graduation, huh? I think however you want to celebrate will be the exact right way — it’s your hard work and talent that got you here.

  2. call you wise.
    let us know when the exact date and time is for the “ceremony” and we’ll all lift a glass and toast in your general direction as you sit somewhere, feet up, smiling.

  3. I’m lifting my coffee cup as a toast to you. And yes, I’m typing with one hand. Slowly.

    OK – back to two-hand typing. I went back and forth on walking for my Master’s degree. Eventually I said why not? My family’s never been to Chicago and it was a nice vacation for all of us. However, if it was another degree from Cal, I may have been more low key.

  4. nova: I usually love attention, but somehow, ceremonies just turn me off–and I sooo understand your lack of a wedding! A City Hall wedding sounds wonderful and so romantic to me. For undergrad, I know I sat in the audience and watched my own graduation. This time around–I’m out of sync with everyone else…I will probably not realize the graduation ceremony is taking place way in the future of next Spring/Summer. And in December/January, when I officially graduate…I’ll probably just do something very quiet, like stare at my diploma.

    christine: ha. an online toast–good idea. 🙂

    queenkv: not done yet, not done yet! I have yet to get final feedback on my thesis (it’s turned in to my reader, but there’s one step left), and then print it out on Thesis Paper and drop it off at school, etc., etc.

  5. Congratulations. Workshops optional from now on. That must be a relief.

  6. But…I have tagged you for a Guilty Pleasures meme. Indulge yourself. Description on my post today. Enjoy!

  7. tiv: I’ll check it out!

  8. heather

    we don’t need no stinkin’ polyester robes! (i’m not walking in may. either. there’s a cocktail party for december grads for the entire university at some point. i could not care less.)

  9. I agree. I feel the same way. I skipped out on my high school graduation and I feel that part of me has consistently avoided my own wedding because of the whole ceremony part.

  10. Ceremonies are overrated. I agree with you. I can’t stand sitting around listening to people who love the sound of their own voices. *yawn*

  11. my wife and i did the same thing, eloped and then had a big wedding to please the parents. i remember having a headache that day.

    i cherish the private ceremony even more, and picking up the wedding certificate from city hall.

  12. Aw, I love ceremonies. Graduations and weddings alike make me all teary. But they have to be at LEAST high school graduations. Kindergarten graduations and middle school graduations are really so dumb and are another example of celebrating because someone is breathing. I think one has to put forth SOME effort to graduate from high school, college, and certainly grad school. You deserve a celebration, at least a private one.

  13. The only reason I went to the ceremony in ’06 is because I was ready and packed to drive back to L.A. the next day. I didn’t want to wait for my diploma in the mail. If I hadn’t moved so soon, I would have skipped the graduation and picked up my diploma the following week because graduations are too long and life is too short.

  14. I am with you on this one Jade…. I didn’t “walk the plank” either for my graduate degree and my wife and I eloped too! We are in great company 🙂

    Congrats on making it through! That alone is a BIG “rite of passage” in my opinion – ceromony or not. And I am a big believer in the advertising slogan: Have it your way!

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