a quiet snowy night


It is a quiet and snowy night here in Tahoe, where we have come for a Christmastime pilgrimage. A bit eerie for me, because the last time I was here during the holidays, I had my stroke on New Year’s Eve. Even now, I get nervous when I get slightly dizzy or disoriented or develop a blind spot, even if it’s caused from a camera flash.

Even though I find Tahoe a peaceful retreat…this time I’m awfully restless. I’m cooking up a storm, baking cookies (learning to bake at altitude!), I can’t sit down and be still. Even though it’s breathtakingly beautiful and I love watching the snow pummeling down to earth, muffling all the sounds until our house feels like a lone cabin in the woods…I can’t settle down. I can’t settle down.

I meant to write. I meant to read. But nope. No writing (unless you count this blog post). No reading (unless you count the New York Magazine I’ve been reading). Been traipsing a bit in the snow, shoveling out the driveway and brushing the snow off the satellite dish (so I can get internet). Been cooking up a storm (I said that, didn’t I?).

My husband exclaimed, “You have a tough time relaxing!” This was during the ten minutes he was awake today, between extended multiple-hour-long naps. Did I mention both dogs napped, too? The one who just had spinal surgery napped in her crate, curled up and cozy, and the other curled up on the sofa next to my husband. I was the only one awake. Hrm. I watched the “House” marathon on the telly. Even though I have a DVD of the first season of “The Wire.”

Restless, restless!

Our friends arrive tomorrow with their toddler in tow. I know these are my last moments of solitary quiet, and here I sit, squandering them away. I even had a short story I meant to start. I have a novel to continue. And I have more spare time coming my way–I’m likely going to work less in the months to come, thanks to the economy. (The economy! Alas!).

I want to enjoy this snowy country! Berkeley had its brief encounter with hail and snow last week but then the clouds dissipated and unveiled a brilliant jeweled landscape…


For in wintertime, Berkeley sparkles. The hills turn emerald green, the trees turn brilliant ruby and gold, and the sky aquamarine. Seriously jewels.

I want to enjoy the snow country–but I guess when it becomes quiet and dark and snowy, it’s a time that encourages inward inspection…and I’m harboring darker thoughts than the landscape. And that makes me restless.

But in other news…I did cut my hair. I’m working on my “fun list” (not to be mistaken with a bucket list, which I have yet to assemble).


And for the record…here is a picture of some of the hail that fell a few days ago:




Filed under Life

11 responses to “a quiet snowy night

  1. chaesq

    Your hair looks awesome, and Berkeley in winter IS beautiful and sparkly. Christmas in NY has become a little bit grey (dirt + once-white-snow = yuck), and I can’t wait ’til spring, for the nabe to start looking like Berkeley now. I hope your restlessness proves fruitful, even if it’s simply getting through “The Wire” or cooking up something scrumptious!

  2. anonwupfan

    There is the dark side to winter, but the sanitized air and bright, clear days can be pretty invigorating. Don’t sit! Save the nights for relaxing, if you’re that restless a day out in the elements is about as carefree as it gets. Use your cookie sheet as a sled, take a pointless stroll, find the perfect place to listen to the birds–my first suggestion would be to get your shovel out and re-bury that satellite dish, pronto!

    This has been bugging me, did it hail or do you mean sleet? I’ve only seen hail during big thunderstorms. Sleet is that slushy icy in-between rain and snow thing (sorry to be a weather nerd, but if it hailed and snowed on the same day that would be even weirder!)

  3. chaesq: You have NO idea of how I WANT to go to NYC! (In fact, I’m trying to plan a trip sometime in late winter–just trying to find friends whose couches I can crash upon).

    anonwupfan: I think I need to confront my demons and then I think all will fall into place…! But yes–I meant hail! Little icy marbles falling from the sky! And yes–it hailed and snowed on the same day (can you believe it). But now I’m up in Tahoe where it’s just snowing.

  4. Annnd–it turns out yesterday’s snowstorm was a blizzard!

  5. Your hair looks beautiful.
    In other news, I am actually delighted you will be working less. More writing? And maybe you and I will do that hill!!

  6. That’s such a good length, Jade! Cuuuute.

    Wishing you the arrival of that peaceful, relaxed vacation frame of mind (which I’m guessing showed up about the time you finished this blog post!) Much love, L

  7. anonwupfan

    I’ve always found demons better confronted when the body was occupied–just saying. How big was your hail (pea-sized, nickel, etc.)?

  8. Susan: yah, it’s a mixed bag. More time to write, but then I feel awful and guilty about not being able to work fulltime and I can’t get past that guilt to write. Unfortunately, I’ve been raised to need other people’s approval before I can move forward with my own ambitions.

    bloglily: thank you…and I wish you great peace this season too. 🙂

    anonwupfan: I posted a picture of the hail for you. It was about pea-sized.

  9. anonwupfan

    Looks like graupel.

  10. anonwupfan: I just learned a new terminology…graupel. I had to go look that up!

  11. anonwupfan

    Yeah, me too actually 🙂
    Who knew the meteorological term would sound so much more elegant than “little styrofoam ball hail stuff”? I can’t wait for the next time it happens here so I can casually drop “graupel” into conversation with the neighbors!

    OK, I better dork away now… Like the short hair BTW, good start for the new year.

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