It is a quiet and snowy night here in Tahoe, where we have come for a Christmastime pilgrimage. A bit eerie for me, because the last time I was here during the holidays, I had my stroke on New Year’s Eve. Even now, I get nervous when I get slightly dizzy or disoriented or develop a blind spot, even if it’s caused from a camera flash.
Even though I find Tahoe a peaceful retreat…this time I’m awfully restless. I’m cooking up a storm, baking cookies (learning to bake at altitude!), I can’t sit down and be still. Even though it’s breathtakingly beautiful and I love watching the snow pummeling down to earth, muffling all the sounds until our house feels like a lone cabin in the woods…I can’t settle down. I can’t settle down.
I meant to write. I meant to read. But nope. No writing (unless you count this blog post). No reading (unless you count the New York Magazine I’ve been reading). Been traipsing a bit in the snow, shoveling out the driveway and brushing the snow off the satellite dish (so I can get internet). Been cooking up a storm (I said that, didn’t I?).
My husband exclaimed, “You have a tough time relaxing!” This was during the ten minutes he was awake today, between extended multiple-hour-long naps. Did I mention both dogs napped, too? The one who just had spinal surgery napped in her crate, curled up and cozy, and the other curled up on the sofa next to my husband. I was the only one awake. Hrm. I watched the “House” marathon on the telly. Even though I have a DVD of the first season of “The Wire.”
Our friends arrive tomorrow with their toddler in tow. I know these are my last moments of solitary quiet, and here I sit, squandering them away. I even had a short story I meant to start. I have a novel to continue. And I have more spare time coming my way–I’m likely going to work less in the months to come, thanks to the economy. (The economy! Alas!).
I want to enjoy this snowy country! Berkeley had its brief encounter with hail and snow last week but then the clouds dissipated and unveiled a brilliant jeweled landscape…
For in wintertime, Berkeley sparkles. The hills turn emerald green, the trees turn brilliant ruby and gold, and the sky aquamarine. Seriously jewels.
I want to enjoy the snow country–but I guess when it becomes quiet and dark and snowy, it’s a time that encourages inward inspection…and I’m harboring darker thoughts than the landscape. And that makes me restless.
But in other news…I did cut my hair. I’m working on my “fun list” (not to be mistaken with a bucket list, which I have yet to assemble).
And for the record…here is a picture of some of the hail that fell a few days ago: